Tuesday, November 30, 2021

Craft Time: Make A Thanksgiving Day Chocobo Hat

It’s 4pm on Thanksgiving Day. You’re probably stuffed with turkey right now, or in the process of stuffing yourself with turkey, or still waiting to stuff yourself with turkey. (If you ate ham, get the hell out of here.) You know what that means? It’s time to make hats! Making turkey hats is an old Thanksgiving tradition. It’s not hard to see why; turkey hats combine two of our favorite things: food and fashion. Hats also make your head look bigger, which will convince people that your brain is huge. People who wear hats are often the life of the party. Need proof? Check out this picture of Spock. Boy what a boring guy. Now, what if we throw a hat on him? Instant party animal! You too can be this guy. But instead of making the traditional Turkey hat for Thanksgiving, why not make a hat using gaming’s first bird: the Chocobo. Read on to find out how. Making Chocobo hats is a fun family affair. It’s also practical. If that annual post-meal brawl breaks out, you’ll already be armed with scissors. Here’s what you’ll need to get started: Construction paper (all colors) Scissors Glue (edible) The unspoken disgust of your older cousins Kenny Loggin’s Top Gun Soundtrack Begin by cutting a piece of yellow paper into a large circle (don’t worry it can’t feel anything.) This is what a circle looks like: Next, cut out a beak and some eyes. Here is what you’re aiming for: If your uncle begins screaming about how his ex-wife wrecked his boat or your nephews start a backyard wrestling match in the living room, crank up Kenny Loggin’s "Danger Zone" and shut out the sound of smashing dishes. Next: putting it all together. Families can be hard. Is your mom screaming at you to take out the garbage? Is your Dad yelling at you, because he doesn’t want you to cut off all the cat’s hair? Is some old man complaining that you broke into his house and stole his war bonds? Ignore them. They don’t understand you. You’re an artist. You need those war bonds to make your Chocobo hat. It’s time to put the whole thing together. Glue your beak and eye to your circle and then affix the whole Chocobo head to another piece of paper (or war bond) and wrap it around your head. Feel free to add a few little extra details to your hat. Really make it your own. Add some extra tuffs off hair or a ruffled brow. If your Chocobo is filled with friendship and magic, add some glitter. If you’ve followed our instructions carefully, you should end up with something like this: *Results may vary There you have it. You are now free to experience the true joys of Thanksgiving. Throw away the unused scraps of paper (ignore their cries for mercy; they weren’t good enough to make the cut.) Now, go have some pie and hug your grandma – not only will she be freaked out by your new hat, she’ll won’t know what to make of this random affection. And remember, if you get bored later, you can always make Chocobo hats for your pets.
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    What's Going On With Demon's Souls On PlayStation 5?

    The Demon’s Souls remake launches in less than two months. Players will soon be traveling back in time to the first incarnation of the modern “Souls-like,” playing the game that would go on to create an entire subgenre of challenging dark fantasy titles. This time, it’s Bluepoint Games’ take on From Software’s classic – an entry many Souls enthusiasts haven’t even played since it is only available on PlayStation 3. In many ways, Demon’s Souls was the evolution of concepts and ideas that had been present in From Software’s King’s Field series for many years. Now, the entire experience is back, exclusively on PlayStation 5.

    Despite its release being incredibly soon as a PlayStation 5 launch title, there are many questions surrounding the game. Let’s take a look at some of the misshaps and mysteries that could be interesting as we inch ever closer to stepping into the Boletarian Palace again.

    What is Fractured Mode and why did they hide it?

    During the initial remake reveal, Sony included messaging about a “Fractured Mode” in the text description of the trailer. This messaging was swiftly removed. Does that mean Fractured Mode doesn’t exist? Are we to believe this was some ethereal thing meant for some other game? If it’s real, what is it and why haven’t we heard about it yet? Was it a concept that was going to be in the game and pulled so it could make the PlayStation 5 launch window?

    Demon's Souls

    If it is in fact a real thing, I’m guessing that Bluepoint has tapped into the Dark Souls PC community hivemind over the last five years and that the mode is similar in fashion to a mod that randomizes encounters, enemy placements, item placements, and more. That would certainly be a fresh way to experience things even for the most seasoned of Demon’s Souls veterans, again and again. Maybe it’s just a boss rush mode. Maybe it doesn’t exist at all anymore. We shall see.

    Is Demon’s Souls actually coming to PC?

    Well, Sony says no. Of course, that misplaced card stuck at the end of the new trailer says fairly explicitly that it’s coming to PC, with the Demon’s Souls logo clearly in plain sight [Read more about this here]. Perhaps it was absolutely human error that included the card, but why did the card exist? Is this, in fact, some misplaced templating mistake that simply was overlooked? It’s possible. Anything’s possible. My own current theory states that these trailers are the subject of such unbelievable scrutiny that such an oversight is generally impossible, except for the fact that work-from-home procedures may have resulted in an errant upload.

    Demon's Souls

    Perhaps “Demon’s Souls Trailer54” instead of “Demon’s Souls Trailer55” was uploaded to some FTP server and the wrong one was grabbed and uploaded. Here’s the point of this speculation: I believe that this new version of Demon’s Souls is, in fact, going to come to PC somewhere down the line — but if Sony reveals that now, it risks losing sales on the PlayStation 5 version as some fans wait for the PC iteration.

    Update 9/21/2020 5:35 CST: It should be noted that the card also mentioned that Demon’s Souls would be console exclusive for a limited time, suggesting that it may in fact arrive on other platforms. Perhaps this was one of the things that caused it to be pulled or excluded. No one can really say!

    Will we finally get to traverse the sixth Archstone?

    Probably not. But some fans say that there’s a hint of those vast frozen northern lands in the original reveal trailer, stating that there’s no snow in the base game. It’s more likely (to me) that the vision of those winterscapes were eventually repurposed and revisioned to give us The Painted World of Ariamis, Frozen Eleum Loyce, Irithyll of the Boreal Valley, and even Cainhurst Castle.

    Yes this is Bloodborne read the accompanying text 😀

    From Software does love snow, and they should, because you can almost feel the biting cold beauty in every one of those levels. There’s speculation that perhaps Bluepoint could be giving players these “lost levels” from the original game, and as much as I think that would be incredible, I also think it’s incredibly unlikely. Let’s hope I’m wrong.

    All that said, let’s get hype! We haven’t seen anything from Elden Ring for ages, so anything Souls is ready for a warm welcome. Let’s hope the Bluepoint incarnation of the From Software classic is as amazing as the legacy the original created.

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